I know the theme wedding tune is busy doing its thing on your thoughts right now. Every good guy out there is worth having. Mmmhh… (Try this) every good guy out there is worth trapping. I didn’t do that on purpose.
Ask any man out there if he’s ever thought about marriage, you’ll definitely get a positive response. Next try asking the same guy if they’re considering their current girl to be the one. I’m not saying you will get an exact no, but you won’t scare up a clear yes either.
If he’s already proposed then lucky you, but just between us two, you did have to go through a lot just to get to that magical moment, right? A guy never thinks about the wedding, he just thinks about spending the rest of his life with that one girl.
Ask any girl to give you the description of her dream wedding and you’ll get information enough to put Google out of business. Don’t bother directing the same question to a man, save yourself the trouble and instead ask him to describe the bride to be. You’ll be lucky to get the description of Tyra Banks with a question mark for a face. I guess that’s what the veils are for.
Imagine if proposing were up to women (pardon me, I had to laugh at that). Most of his mates have already tied the knot or are looking towards that horizon, trust me girl he’s thinking faster than a jet in a tailspin. Be wise and start planning and while you’re at it please wipe that ‘I don’t get it’ look out of your face.
The wedding magazine that you were reading and accidentally left open on his coffee table with the remote on top of it, your sudden fascination with rings, cakes and conversations revolving around the past weddings you attended. Need I say more?
I am a rock, I am an Island that’s the motto of pretty much every guy I have ever met. Men like to think of themselves as independent, loners, mavericks, but the truth is not most of them can do it alone. A relationship, like life, is a team sport and eventually they do have to get out of their shells and decide what team they want to bet for.
The thing about a guy proposing in real life, it’s nothing like being asked to the prom, being first picked can be terrifying, and being chosen last isn’t the worst thing in the world. So we watch from the sidelines, clinging to our isolations, because we know as soon as we let go of that wedding dream, someone comes along and changes your life completely.
A & A.
The Modern Woman
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
What Modern women should know about X's and Y?
X marks the spot, the X factor, X files. Mysteries and the letter X sure go a long way back. “Come on honey he/she is just my ex, right now we’re just friends.” You must be skating on thin ice to believe these words.
Forbidden fruits taste sweetest, that’s why you used to lick sugar and lie about it when you were a child. Unobtainable is like an aphrodisiac to the human mind, what you can’t get, you want twice as much, you even dream about it.
Breakups today are more popular than sin, but what really gets me going is the number of arrangements that come up after that. Things like friends with benefits, my anytime biscuits, no strings attached, one night’s stand, affairs, booty calls and you wonder why the latex industry is booming.
Just think back to the last time you were single, now propel your mind to the time you were seriously attached. Compare the two with the number of times you were asked out during both times. That’s why it is easy to spot the singles in a club.
Even so, none of this compares to the magnetic pull of the ex. If the ex happens back in your life within a two month break, your time sense takes an anticlockwise acceleration. Your only defense here is pride, which is an excuse to cover up for what you will be feeling at that moment.
We’re born, we live, we die, sometimes not necessarily in that order. We put things to rest only to have them rise up again. So if death is not the end, what can you count on anymore? Because you can’t sure count on anything in life. Life is the most fragile, unstable, unpredictable thing there is. Infact there is only one thing about life we can be sure of.
There is a reason why some things in life are temporary, progress is the one constant thing we can always count on. Problem is progress can go both ways. Pain is one of life’s important lessons, it teaches with the worst method but it is as temporary as a second.
History is one way to tell what your future may end up looking like. Just remember, the same way lightening does not strike the same place twice, no two events in life can make a jigsaw fit. Your ex can be the best or worst thing that can happen to your new life, bear this in mind and stop looking for your future in your past. Pain is a temporary human feeling, but is has the power to stop your heart inside your chest.
A&A.
Forbidden fruits taste sweetest, that’s why you used to lick sugar and lie about it when you were a child. Unobtainable is like an aphrodisiac to the human mind, what you can’t get, you want twice as much, you even dream about it.
Breakups today are more popular than sin, but what really gets me going is the number of arrangements that come up after that. Things like friends with benefits, my anytime biscuits, no strings attached, one night’s stand, affairs, booty calls and you wonder why the latex industry is booming.
Just think back to the last time you were single, now propel your mind to the time you were seriously attached. Compare the two with the number of times you were asked out during both times. That’s why it is easy to spot the singles in a club.
Even so, none of this compares to the magnetic pull of the ex. If the ex happens back in your life within a two month break, your time sense takes an anticlockwise acceleration. Your only defense here is pride, which is an excuse to cover up for what you will be feeling at that moment.
We’re born, we live, we die, sometimes not necessarily in that order. We put things to rest only to have them rise up again. So if death is not the end, what can you count on anymore? Because you can’t sure count on anything in life. Life is the most fragile, unstable, unpredictable thing there is. Infact there is only one thing about life we can be sure of.
There is a reason why some things in life are temporary, progress is the one constant thing we can always count on. Problem is progress can go both ways. Pain is one of life’s important lessons, it teaches with the worst method but it is as temporary as a second.
History is one way to tell what your future may end up looking like. Just remember, the same way lightening does not strike the same place twice, no two events in life can make a jigsaw fit. Your ex can be the best or worst thing that can happen to your new life, bear this in mind and stop looking for your future in your past. Pain is a temporary human feeling, but is has the power to stop your heart inside your chest.
A&A.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
VIOLET VIOLIN
Don’t get it twisted, classical music would make as much sense to me as a night club to a nun. As for violet apart from the royal qualities associated to it, my mind becomes a yawning hole immediately purple flashes through. An eye arresting topic on the other hand just did the trick.
“Do you like it when I wear my hair in a pony tail?” Frankly speaking, she had a forehead that could make a whale blush, but imagine the results if I had told her the truth. Everybody lies; the only problem is that men get caught at it nine times out of ten of the time. In short men are just lousy liars.
Practice makes perfect, or so they say, but do perfect lies make perfect men? Let’s face the facts, when it comes to a woman’s looks instead of dishing out a negative comment within her earshot, why not try running through a mine field with a pack of wolves chasing you?
Truth be told, rather than tell the truth, a man will make an appointment to visit a rock and a hard place. Of course nobody can live off lies, at least not everyday anyway. Think of it this way, a lie is as useful to a guy as seduction is to a girl.
Not all men lie, one might argue but who would want to hear the naked truth instead? Of course honesty is a beautiful thing because it breeds trust. Think of the first date situation, he lied about his hobbies, she lied about her age, who’s smarter now?
Over the period of time you really got to know each other enough to want to let them in and slowly by slowly the lies became less and less. Don’t be fooled, now that you trust each other only makes you a better liar. I didn’t mean to burst your bubble, just think of it in this context, the more the trust, the less but stronger the lies become.
Here is some music to your ears in case you’re the emotional type and are thinking that all this is a load of crap. If he or she has never lied to you before then you’re probably not in a good place relationship wise currently or worst case scenario you broke up faster than you can spell lie.
I had a bad judgment call once, the family of a close friend lost their mother but they could not reach her so they called me instead. The thing is, her boyfriend proposed on that very day, with her excitement I decided to put off telling her till it was opportune. Needless to say, when she found out she was inconsolable but that was nothing compared to her level of contempt towards me. She called me a liar, while I tried to think of myself as protecting her feelings. I don’t know what you think but it’s the same difference, we all need a wake up call sometimes.
A.A.
“Do you like it when I wear my hair in a pony tail?” Frankly speaking, she had a forehead that could make a whale blush, but imagine the results if I had told her the truth. Everybody lies; the only problem is that men get caught at it nine times out of ten of the time. In short men are just lousy liars.
Practice makes perfect, or so they say, but do perfect lies make perfect men? Let’s face the facts, when it comes to a woman’s looks instead of dishing out a negative comment within her earshot, why not try running through a mine field with a pack of wolves chasing you?
Truth be told, rather than tell the truth, a man will make an appointment to visit a rock and a hard place. Of course nobody can live off lies, at least not everyday anyway. Think of it this way, a lie is as useful to a guy as seduction is to a girl.
Not all men lie, one might argue but who would want to hear the naked truth instead? Of course honesty is a beautiful thing because it breeds trust. Think of the first date situation, he lied about his hobbies, she lied about her age, who’s smarter now?
Over the period of time you really got to know each other enough to want to let them in and slowly by slowly the lies became less and less. Don’t be fooled, now that you trust each other only makes you a better liar. I didn’t mean to burst your bubble, just think of it in this context, the more the trust, the less but stronger the lies become.
Here is some music to your ears in case you’re the emotional type and are thinking that all this is a load of crap. If he or she has never lied to you before then you’re probably not in a good place relationship wise currently or worst case scenario you broke up faster than you can spell lie.
I had a bad judgment call once, the family of a close friend lost their mother but they could not reach her so they called me instead. The thing is, her boyfriend proposed on that very day, with her excitement I decided to put off telling her till it was opportune. Needless to say, when she found out she was inconsolable but that was nothing compared to her level of contempt towards me. She called me a liar, while I tried to think of myself as protecting her feelings. I don’t know what you think but it’s the same difference, we all need a wake up call sometimes.
A.A.
Monday, January 11, 2010
FRUIT SALAD
I wonder whether Science will make giant leaps and maybe discover another solar system with a habitable planet, then we can finally try to separate his from hers. Who am I kidding? Just the thought alone is an exercise in futility.
Gender wars are here to stay so why not help the cause? Ever wonder how men come up with their girl types? Picture your skull hosting a village of geeks and idiots and you’re one step closer. Men are purely visual creatures so it’s only natural for categories to be involved.
Fantasy chic is every dude’s smokes and mirrors. This is one chic he can never picture himself with not even if the geeks do away with the idiots, yup and you sure guessed right, we’re talking divas, movie stars, fashion models the list can stretch but my geeks and idiots are acting up. Unavailable is a resounding bell in this zone.
The wish chic comes next, almost as good looking as the fantasy chic the only difference in this case, she’s flesh and blood. She’s available, she’s hot and she’s within a geographical boundary that doesn’t require the use of an IQ above that of a piece of wood. The plastic smiles from the hot office chic which for some reason gravitate towards you, the cheerleader who is just about as interested in you as she is to Math or the famous girl next door who makes you feel like you’ve been staring at an Arctic scenery for too long. Well at least there’s some hope here, maybe cloning may be perfected for those of us with weak game.
The e.t.c. category, what’s to say? Every Jane, Mary and Martha belongs here. If the Fantasy chic is a peach and the wish chic a cream then all the others are just a mixed fruit basket. Sorry, the male mind hasn’t fully developed to include another category. These are the most dated women, and oh yeah, the heart break ratings here are enough to leave a bad taste in your mouth. Beautiful and available are the two constant factors that fuel this fire. There is choice necessitated by selection, but most just end up with a serious luck of options, if there’s a question mark floating somewhere above your head, you are not alone.
When it comes to women, selection is just about as useful to a guy as breast feeding tips. If you’re having a problem digesting this then ask yourself why every girl regrets the guys they’ve been with, while every guy reminisces about the girls they couldn’t be with. Food for thought might work, but I’d rather fix myself a mixed fruit salad.
A.A.
Gender wars are here to stay so why not help the cause? Ever wonder how men come up with their girl types? Picture your skull hosting a village of geeks and idiots and you’re one step closer. Men are purely visual creatures so it’s only natural for categories to be involved.
Fantasy chic is every dude’s smokes and mirrors. This is one chic he can never picture himself with not even if the geeks do away with the idiots, yup and you sure guessed right, we’re talking divas, movie stars, fashion models the list can stretch but my geeks and idiots are acting up. Unavailable is a resounding bell in this zone.
The wish chic comes next, almost as good looking as the fantasy chic the only difference in this case, she’s flesh and blood. She’s available, she’s hot and she’s within a geographical boundary that doesn’t require the use of an IQ above that of a piece of wood. The plastic smiles from the hot office chic which for some reason gravitate towards you, the cheerleader who is just about as interested in you as she is to Math or the famous girl next door who makes you feel like you’ve been staring at an Arctic scenery for too long. Well at least there’s some hope here, maybe cloning may be perfected for those of us with weak game.
The e.t.c. category, what’s to say? Every Jane, Mary and Martha belongs here. If the Fantasy chic is a peach and the wish chic a cream then all the others are just a mixed fruit basket. Sorry, the male mind hasn’t fully developed to include another category. These are the most dated women, and oh yeah, the heart break ratings here are enough to leave a bad taste in your mouth. Beautiful and available are the two constant factors that fuel this fire. There is choice necessitated by selection, but most just end up with a serious luck of options, if there’s a question mark floating somewhere above your head, you are not alone.
When it comes to women, selection is just about as useful to a guy as breast feeding tips. If you’re having a problem digesting this then ask yourself why every girl regrets the guys they’ve been with, while every guy reminisces about the girls they couldn’t be with. Food for thought might work, but I’d rather fix myself a mixed fruit salad.
A.A.
Monday, November 16, 2009
NIKE
I love my nike just as i do my bike. If i get a cheating girlfriend i tell her to take a hike. If you want to hide, look for a dike, you better watch out for the spike! I love my nike, not just for psyche, but also because it matches me on the mic.
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